The Ruin Script

today is the 20th, saturday. it is already 14:39. 20th of september doesn’t ring a bell, this is just a usual day. however, this day feels odd. something inside me is knocking to be acknowledged, i don’t know what it is. or maybe i am just being delusional?

i woke up maybe around 11am? i don’t remember exactly. one thing i am sure of, i woke up feeling blue. i got up from bed, did my routine: washed my face, brushed my teeth, grabbed my coffee and meal, checked my social media—nothing really new.

i conversed in a few conversations, replied to my friends, and uploaded a post on our group page. that’s it. nothing really happened but the exhaustion i feel inside is something i cannot name. perhaps i’m just exaggerating.

my head is aching. maybe because of the heat index? 30 degrees celsius. or i am just hungry? i don’t know. this is getting nowhere, lol. but anyway, i am trying to recall what happened for the past few days, especially since i easily tend to forget details.

i met new people. some are refreshing, some are not. let’s just focus on september. someone i knew from the past came back. there’s no ache, only… wait, i cannot find the right word. i am snapping my fingers trying to find one. i gave up—my tongue and mind are twisted. i’ll describe it instead: it’s like the storm i have been trying to calm for years already found its sanity. i don’t really know what exactly i am typing right now, i am just glad to know we’re good.

time check, 15:07. my mother is beside me while i’m typing this. i’m sitting on my bed, grabbing my snacks—a bread with peanut butter and orange juice. today’s heat is overwhelming. i don’t exactly know what i am feeling now. i even posted on my threads that i want to go to a coffee shop. however, i live far from the city, and it’s too tiring to travel. i just want to be alone, sipping a good coffee with a good ambiance. i just want iced coffee—and someone, no need to talk, just presence.

this narrative is getting nowhere. my head is aching trying to find words. i’ll stop typing now. and maybe, go to sleep? i don’t know. i’ll be posting this later. i’ll finish my snacks first then try to sleep. so yeah, these are the details of my 20th of september, as of 15:15.

saturday blue,
achilleus

author’s note:
— bled by @achilleusdeirdre
— 20th of september, year 2025
— open to criticism; all echoes welcome.
— lowercase intended for signature writing.